Merry Christmas poor and content folks!
The gang on my wifes side come today and then another shabang on sat with my family.Its been rough getting it together this year .Wendi (my wife) and I have been working like crazy trying to find time to enjoy it at all .We dont believe in falling into rushing all over just to be crazy up to the last minute.So we take our time.
I need to explain that when I said I wasnt Christian its really because I cannot and will not just follow something I truly havent studied.Did church and Sunday school but was told to and at about 13 I just thought there must be more.
At any rate I celebrate Love and rebirth at the holidays the Christian way is to celebrate the birth of Christ.What better way to celebrate than the greatest love that comes with the birth of a child,nothing is more pure and or sacred.
In easier terms the holidays are about love and sharing in a much more open fashion and that suits me fine.We all need compassion and love every day.........Get out there and show them all how much your heart believes in them and that you are at their service each and every day.
May the beauty of the season live in your heart and give you the strength to love without condition.
Happy Holidays to all.
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
Friday, December 13, 2013
My depression is lifting ,still working like crazy and retail is still a completely
ironic (and moronic).I try not to judge ,I work at an upscale department
store and when people come in buying 400 dollar shoes over and over
(yes they are addicted)I cant help but wonder the good it could do for somebody
in need.......maybe they donate too.But the rate they spend money on "things"
just kinda gives me the creeps.
Oh well,at any rate things are coming along and it helps that my wife is not into all the rushing and "crazy" people put themselves under.
We enjoy the time before the holidays so much,quiet nights of beautiful lights and music and a good dinner is all we need to make us happy.
The last 2 years we didnt finish decorating the tree till the night before.....not out of laziness(we really loved it with just lights for a while)but I refuse to think I "have"to get EVERYTHING done on some kind of schedule The holidays are a time of love that brings even the most intolerant people a reason to say I love you to someone.Sad that it takes that but at least for a short time people are a little more demonstrative.
I am not a christian......I dont beleive christ is my savior.There were too many teachers and great leaders in other religions that cannot be dismissed.
But all of them say the same thing,have love and compassion.Confucius coined the golden rule of treating others the way you want to be treated 500 years before Christ.None of this matters,as long as you can find a way to realize you are not at the steering wheel and know that something divine that nobody has the answer to is guiding us to love and peacefulness if we choose to practice what should be inherent ,but it takes time.
Push on poor folk ,the holiday may be bright after all.
ironic (and moronic).I try not to judge ,I work at an upscale department
store and when people come in buying 400 dollar shoes over and over
(yes they are addicted)I cant help but wonder the good it could do for somebody
in need.......maybe they donate too.But the rate they spend money on "things"
just kinda gives me the creeps.
Oh well,at any rate things are coming along and it helps that my wife is not into all the rushing and "crazy" people put themselves under.
We enjoy the time before the holidays so much,quiet nights of beautiful lights and music and a good dinner is all we need to make us happy.
The last 2 years we didnt finish decorating the tree till the night before.....not out of laziness(we really loved it with just lights for a while)but I refuse to think I "have"to get EVERYTHING done on some kind of schedule The holidays are a time of love that brings even the most intolerant people a reason to say I love you to someone.Sad that it takes that but at least for a short time people are a little more demonstrative.
I am not a christian......I dont beleive christ is my savior.There were too many teachers and great leaders in other religions that cannot be dismissed.
But all of them say the same thing,have love and compassion.Confucius coined the golden rule of treating others the way you want to be treated 500 years before Christ.None of this matters,as long as you can find a way to realize you are not at the steering wheel and know that something divine that nobody has the answer to is guiding us to love and peacefulness if we choose to practice what should be inherent ,but it takes time.
Push on poor folk ,the holiday may be bright after all.
Sunday, December 8, 2013
I am failing miserably this year trying to get through the holidays.My work load has increased so dramatically and my schedule is screwed because of having to work saturdays all month.So getting enough rest is impossible.
How many of you feel pressure from the people in your life to "be happy,its the holidays".It is so difficult when people expect.
Since I started retail (absurd,for this non-consumer)I have become more and more depressed .Im really walking a fine line the last few days .Trying so hard to find my gratitude and find a way to stand the ridiculously huge way we celebrate.
I would love to return to the long ago Christmases,when people celebrated for a day not a whole 2
months.My grandma used to tell of holidays that were easy and simple and most of it was based in the gathering of loved ones and having wonderful food.And when she was married (to a grandpa I never met as he died when I was a year old) they did what they could and that was enough.I miss her so much and shes been gone for 22 years.
But right now I need my dad so much.He died 18 years ago and is probably the only person that could understand this twisted up sad ,awful crap Im feeling.He was a very simple person and I followed right in his footsteps appreciating the things in life that come without fanfare.Sitting still on a day off(while my mother fumed not realizing what demanding physical labor even means)enjoying food,resting.And if my mother is reading this,she will no doubt think "what about his drinking?"Drinking is a giant problem in my family and I will write many blogs about it later, Myself and several family members have struggled and my brother died of it even though it was a suicide it stemmed from the alcoholism and what I believe was manic depression.I have been getting sober for 24 years.I wasnt the classic crazy drunk people cant stand (I have several in my life right now)I simply could not sleep anymore,saw a therapist and realized the alcohol had turned on me and started to agitate instead of medicate.I am chronic which is way easier because now if I were to drink I would be sick immediately.People need to educate themselves alcohol is by far the worst thing you can do to your body besides smoking.Im not talking about a drink or two.But lets be honest most people have way more than that and much more often than they would ever admit.Geez if we had not made pot such a bad thing we would of been way better off relaxing,laughing and going to bed.Legalize please.By the way pot smoke is not even close to having the carcinogens off cigarettes.Educate yourself folks.
Today is the town Christmas parade.People will come here for food after.I have grown so tired of it over the years,and Im completely not into another gathering (geez,we just saw them all a week ago thanksgiving .)
I am up very early and will cook later.Want some t.v. and super soul sunday to help rise this broken spirit of a man these days.But I wont give up,I will try to remain in a calm place and be grateful.I love them all and love tradition,its just been a super rough year.My poor wife has to suffer my rage at all things silly and its not fair and I work on trying to shut up and listen before I open my mouth and say something so awful nobody could compete with it..In my family we learned good how to eat someone alive w/words.It still goes on and I find myself more disgusted all the time.But seeing that will drive me to practice what I know Im here for, and that is to care for others,love is the only way out.
How many of you feel pressure from the people in your life to "be happy,its the holidays".It is so difficult when people expect.
Since I started retail (absurd,for this non-consumer)I have become more and more depressed .Im really walking a fine line the last few days .Trying so hard to find my gratitude and find a way to stand the ridiculously huge way we celebrate.
I would love to return to the long ago Christmases,when people celebrated for a day not a whole 2
months.My grandma used to tell of holidays that were easy and simple and most of it was based in the gathering of loved ones and having wonderful food.And when she was married (to a grandpa I never met as he died when I was a year old) they did what they could and that was enough.I miss her so much and shes been gone for 22 years.
But right now I need my dad so much.He died 18 years ago and is probably the only person that could understand this twisted up sad ,awful crap Im feeling.He was a very simple person and I followed right in his footsteps appreciating the things in life that come without fanfare.Sitting still on a day off(while my mother fumed not realizing what demanding physical labor even means)enjoying food,resting.And if my mother is reading this,she will no doubt think "what about his drinking?"Drinking is a giant problem in my family and I will write many blogs about it later, Myself and several family members have struggled and my brother died of it even though it was a suicide it stemmed from the alcoholism and what I believe was manic depression.I have been getting sober for 24 years.I wasnt the classic crazy drunk people cant stand (I have several in my life right now)I simply could not sleep anymore,saw a therapist and realized the alcohol had turned on me and started to agitate instead of medicate.I am chronic which is way easier because now if I were to drink I would be sick immediately.People need to educate themselves alcohol is by far the worst thing you can do to your body besides smoking.Im not talking about a drink or two.But lets be honest most people have way more than that and much more often than they would ever admit.Geez if we had not made pot such a bad thing we would of been way better off relaxing,laughing and going to bed.Legalize please.By the way pot smoke is not even close to having the carcinogens off cigarettes.Educate yourself folks.
Today is the town Christmas parade.People will come here for food after.I have grown so tired of it over the years,and Im completely not into another gathering (geez,we just saw them all a week ago thanksgiving .)
I am up very early and will cook later.Want some t.v. and super soul sunday to help rise this broken spirit of a man these days.But I wont give up,I will try to remain in a calm place and be grateful.I love them all and love tradition,its just been a super rough year.My poor wife has to suffer my rage at all things silly and its not fair and I work on trying to shut up and listen before I open my mouth and say something so awful nobody could compete with it..In my family we learned good how to eat someone alive w/words.It still goes on and I find myself more disgusted all the time.But seeing that will drive me to practice what I know Im here for, and that is to care for others,love is the only way out.
Sunday, November 24, 2013
It would seem the holidays are upon us(Charlie Brown)
Working retail and all the holiday hoopla is so out of hand.There was a time not so long ago when people really did celebrate just the love of gathering without spending ridiculous amounts of money.Because of job loss and very trying times I see people getting more and more depressed or completely upset due to not being able to purchase everything they want.There are ways around it but I think people feel picked out to suffer,I certainly do from time to time.
Since I love to cook and did it for years,we have thanksgiving ,Christmas ,and Easter,usually around 15 people..........at Christmas I do it twice in a week as my side of the family arrives later......its great because we get a whole day with each family.I started doing this when my father died,when he was living I had 3 places to be moms,dads, and my wifes family.
It is exactly the same to have your celebration on a different day,nothing is changed,there is all the music decorations,the food the fun.......and not near the stress of having over everybody in one day.......no thanks!Many of you will wonder how we afford it being low income?
Be creative,think hard before you purchase.......are you trying to impress or do you love the person so much it wouldnt matter what you got them?We put stipulations on ourselves to buy properly or for the right amount.I once bought a cute but cheap doll for my grandma(I adored her)and enclosed a note about the fact that we are never to old to be children at Christmas.She wept,which isnt what I expected but it was the first time at 15 years old that I realized people want to be thought of and seen at their core and not receive some out of your range gift that they wont derive pleasure,memory or love from.So take care when you shop.
As for food,buy ahead all the little things.If you do it a week at a time you will have more than you imagine.
My mother-in law buys the turkey for thanksgiving and when its Christmas she makes stuffed cabbage that is my favorite!So i do all the side stuff and start buying slowly to cushion the blow of a whole shopping cart of food for one meal!(you poorandcontenters know what I mean)
In the end regardless of what you do, cook,or how much you have,staying in a state of grace and stillness during the holidays is a challenge worth trying.You will fail at times ,but the moments you get love that the season brings will carry you to your own holiday world.
Working retail and all the holiday hoopla is so out of hand.There was a time not so long ago when people really did celebrate just the love of gathering without spending ridiculous amounts of money.Because of job loss and very trying times I see people getting more and more depressed or completely upset due to not being able to purchase everything they want.There are ways around it but I think people feel picked out to suffer,I certainly do from time to time.
Since I love to cook and did it for years,we have thanksgiving ,Christmas ,and Easter,usually around 15 people..........at Christmas I do it twice in a week as my side of the family arrives later......its great because we get a whole day with each family.I started doing this when my father died,when he was living I had 3 places to be moms,dads, and my wifes family.
It is exactly the same to have your celebration on a different day,nothing is changed,there is all the music decorations,the food the fun.......and not near the stress of having over everybody in one day.......no thanks!Many of you will wonder how we afford it being low income?
Be creative,think hard before you purchase.......are you trying to impress or do you love the person so much it wouldnt matter what you got them?We put stipulations on ourselves to buy properly or for the right amount.I once bought a cute but cheap doll for my grandma(I adored her)and enclosed a note about the fact that we are never to old to be children at Christmas.She wept,which isnt what I expected but it was the first time at 15 years old that I realized people want to be thought of and seen at their core and not receive some out of your range gift that they wont derive pleasure,memory or love from.So take care when you shop.
As for food,buy ahead all the little things.If you do it a week at a time you will have more than you imagine.
My mother-in law buys the turkey for thanksgiving and when its Christmas she makes stuffed cabbage that is my favorite!So i do all the side stuff and start buying slowly to cushion the blow of a whole shopping cart of food for one meal!(you poorandcontenters know what I mean)
In the end regardless of what you do, cook,or how much you have,staying in a state of grace and stillness during the holidays is a challenge worth trying.You will fail at times ,but the moments you get love that the season brings will carry you to your own holiday world.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Today I am starting a whole 2 days off after 1 in 9.I think for a lot of us in our mid life who lost a bunch in 2008,its just plain old being tired.This is complicated by a lingering of sad and depression that can be so difficult to fight.
My new way of dealing with my stressful,physical,low pay job is to put it on the back burner as much as I can.My wife and I are lucky to be able to spend just a small amount of time getting the rage and general yuck out of our systems each night.Then we move on to funny stuff and other issues that interest me so much more than what I do for money.I still look for work always.....but I wont have this kind of thing take up my life.There is so much more to keep me distracted so its a blessing that somehow I keep the silly work life where it belongs.
I havent left a poor and content recipe in forever heres a fast great one.
Whole wheat pasta w/tomato
Get a box of whole wheat pasta(thats your protein)
Cook it.
While thats cooking open 2 cans of diced tomatoes (low salt if possible)
I grow fresh basil (easy)But you can use dry ,at least a tablespoon heaped.
Now ad any frozen veg you like(i use spinach or french green beans or broccoli
about half a bag.Pepper for sure salt if you like(Im not much on salting food people can
do that on their own).But I also add anything I have around ,I love Mrs.Dash.There are
all kinds of them.Put all this in a microwave safe bowl covered and nuke till hot and the
veggies a desired tenderness(crisper is healthier)Go 3 or 4 minutes then stir and proceed
for a few more minutes.Spoon lovely mixture over hot pasta,
Cost:
Pasta 1.00 (walmart)
2 16oz cans low salt tomatoes 1.26
Fresh basil (free,or 1.00 at dollar store )
Frozen veg 1.00 (walmart)
You may top this off w/ any cheese you have ,Parmesan is best(1.00 at dollar store make sure its real)
Walmart has great day old bread sales,you can buy various things for a buck.
If you actually bought all of this it would set you back 6.26
Most of us have a part of this around so Id say 4 to 5 bucks to feed four is amazing.
Today we are happy to have part of a pork loin I got super cheap at Kroger and I have
made 2 meals already.This is some I froze.Being creative is key in cooking,I always say just because you have never seen it doesnt mean you cant create something delicious for nothing.
Push on poor folk ,things cost ,but the world outside your door is free.If you are in a place that is ugly due to the ravages of others at least look up at the sky.Say thankyou and ask what you can do to help.
My new way of dealing with my stressful,physical,low pay job is to put it on the back burner as much as I can.My wife and I are lucky to be able to spend just a small amount of time getting the rage and general yuck out of our systems each night.Then we move on to funny stuff and other issues that interest me so much more than what I do for money.I still look for work always.....but I wont have this kind of thing take up my life.There is so much more to keep me distracted so its a blessing that somehow I keep the silly work life where it belongs.
I havent left a poor and content recipe in forever heres a fast great one.
Whole wheat pasta w/tomato
Get a box of whole wheat pasta(thats your protein)
Cook it.
While thats cooking open 2 cans of diced tomatoes (low salt if possible)
I grow fresh basil (easy)But you can use dry ,at least a tablespoon heaped.
Now ad any frozen veg you like(i use spinach or french green beans or broccoli
about half a bag.Pepper for sure salt if you like(Im not much on salting food people can
do that on their own).But I also add anything I have around ,I love Mrs.Dash.There are
all kinds of them.Put all this in a microwave safe bowl covered and nuke till hot and the
veggies a desired tenderness(crisper is healthier)Go 3 or 4 minutes then stir and proceed
for a few more minutes.Spoon lovely mixture over hot pasta,
Cost:
Pasta 1.00 (walmart)
2 16oz cans low salt tomatoes 1.26
Fresh basil (free,or 1.00 at dollar store )
Frozen veg 1.00 (walmart)
You may top this off w/ any cheese you have ,Parmesan is best(1.00 at dollar store make sure its real)
Walmart has great day old bread sales,you can buy various things for a buck.
If you actually bought all of this it would set you back 6.26
Most of us have a part of this around so Id say 4 to 5 bucks to feed four is amazing.
Today we are happy to have part of a pork loin I got super cheap at Kroger and I have
made 2 meals already.This is some I froze.Being creative is key in cooking,I always say just because you have never seen it doesnt mean you cant create something delicious for nothing.
Push on poor folk ,things cost ,but the world outside your door is free.If you are in a place that is ugly due to the ravages of others at least look up at the sky.Say thankyou and ask what you can do to help.
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
The gratitude I have for making it through a grueling day without real anger about something is quite amazing to me.I hate Hot and today its 97 in Michigan.Making it most muggy in the back rooms we toil in.But there was laughter due to the right mix on staff and besides being sore as crap,I am very happy once again in my home that we love so much looking across at the state woods.Healing any wound of your day.I heard someone say when your feeling like the day is a mess,take a walk in nature or go to a quiet place with a view and you will feel an instant change....what the change is we dont know but it exists and is there for me right across the street.I am saying thankyou to a hovering power more all the time.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Time gets away and I dont get here like I want to.Often I find my day is so physically tiring that I just want to meditate and relax when I get home.Meditation is hard .......I have yet to be able to master it to call it success everyday but it helps for me to take time everyday to sit still for 15 mins or so.My wife gave me a glass stone I keep on me that says Be still and know I am God.........I am not formally religious in any way but I believe this thing many call god is the power of all things.Look around you ,the sky is an absolute miracle at any time of day......I love night,but what Im saying is there are things right in front of our faces that we dont even notice due to worry or stress over daily life.I have to make myself stop and slow down all the time...the stone keeps me focused when I feel like raging I look at it and it helps.
My wife and I also watch a lot of the spiritual discussions on the Super Soul Sunday series.Finding my place spiritually has been a long journey,church was so demanding to me and I saw people like my friend from childhood Billy Koza do all the catholic hoopla(schooling,nuns,etc.That was something I just didnt "get".So I have found my own way and it all just keeps returning to love.If Im in my loving place the effect it has on me and the people around me makes my whole day better.Practice,and more practice and Im and feeling better all the time.Dont let the financial and struggle take the miracles of the day away from you, all you have to do is take the time to stop and say thankyou and look around.Persist poor and contenters and have the best Sunday possible.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
A Sunday morning with fresh cool air after toiling in hot and sticky for the last few weeks.I really dont like hot weather and this renews me by just breathing the fresh air.
We have had multiple expenses that have eaten away any money we have had.A huge car bill over a 1000.00 dollars and our central air hasnt worked for 2 years(but found a guy to do it!)so then went and spent more money on a room unit conditioner that looks like hell as I have sliding windows and had to install it using lots of plastic,tape,cardboard.......but it works and sleep is sooo important when you are laboring and doing grunt work.
I had problems staying focused and in a grateful place.When its hot the mean in me is there just ready to boil over and splash on anyone who gets too close.The practice it takes to change behavior is so hard and there are so many people that dont even think about their daily interactions it makes it even harder for those of us that want to.
It is so automatic to react to peoples judgement or opinion.And of course what they think is of absolutely no importance in the end. Depak Chopra says "What other people think of me is none of my business".
Now that is a huge hurdle and will take years to get to......but I want so much to get there.
My day today is good,I have everything I need and old friends are coming to visit.Thats enough for me and I plan to really enjoy it.
We have had multiple expenses that have eaten away any money we have had.A huge car bill over a 1000.00 dollars and our central air hasnt worked for 2 years(but found a guy to do it!)so then went and spent more money on a room unit conditioner that looks like hell as I have sliding windows and had to install it using lots of plastic,tape,cardboard.......but it works and sleep is sooo important when you are laboring and doing grunt work.
I had problems staying focused and in a grateful place.When its hot the mean in me is there just ready to boil over and splash on anyone who gets too close.The practice it takes to change behavior is so hard and there are so many people that dont even think about their daily interactions it makes it even harder for those of us that want to.
It is so automatic to react to peoples judgement or opinion.And of course what they think is of absolutely no importance in the end. Depak Chopra says "What other people think of me is none of my business".
Now that is a huge hurdle and will take years to get to......but I want so much to get there.
My day today is good,I have everything I need and old friends are coming to visit.Thats enough for me and I plan to really enjoy it.
Sunday, June 16, 2013
One of the hard parts of being low-income is trying to keep your self esteem fresh when you are laboring at a job that you dislike, and still have time and energy to look for better income.
I suppose most of those feelings come from basing to much of our lives on what we do for a living instead of who we actually are authentically.
Being of service emotionally to people I believe is one of my best gifts.When ever I am really down if I say a kind word or do something kind for people it always refreshes me.It makes so much more of a connection with people when they think somebody cares.So often we clam up about what we really feel inside and I believe people do great disservice to all who love them.
Talking is the easiest thing in the world until we have a struggle with something we may feel embarrassed about or just uncomfortable.But in my mind truly there is not much we have all not seen and then for those with monstrous,unbelievable.,life events, the more sharing they do the better they may feel,but they are teaching all around them that life is survivable.
When your truly at the end of your rope physically,emotionally or just down........say something of care and kindness to people and you will feel the energy in your heart pump up for the next round.
I suppose most of those feelings come from basing to much of our lives on what we do for a living instead of who we actually are authentically.
Being of service emotionally to people I believe is one of my best gifts.When ever I am really down if I say a kind word or do something kind for people it always refreshes me.It makes so much more of a connection with people when they think somebody cares.So often we clam up about what we really feel inside and I believe people do great disservice to all who love them.
Talking is the easiest thing in the world until we have a struggle with something we may feel embarrassed about or just uncomfortable.But in my mind truly there is not much we have all not seen and then for those with monstrous,unbelievable.,life events, the more sharing they do the better they may feel,but they are teaching all around them that life is survivable.
When your truly at the end of your rope physically,emotionally or just down........say something of care and kindness to people and you will feel the energy in your heart pump up for the next round.
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Okay,so Im back after months of no computer.A wonderful friend was visiting for my birthday and got me back online!I have no money for extras so relying on others kindnesses has been a true blessing in my life.
I have been struggling a lot with staying in a grateful state.This is my first full day off in ten so perhaps Im burned out.(sore too but thats daily).
My life at work is confusing and difficult,too many bosses and wasted time on doing what one says and then turning around and doing it differently because the other one says something opposite.
So glad to finally have bennies but the toll it takes on my meager paycheck is major so I will continue looking for better work.Anyone out there open their paycheck and get sad?Sometimes I even get tears brimming.
BUT,remembering what I have instead of dont have helps a lot.
My wife has been awesome to me,understanding how frustrating it is for a 53 yr old man with talents and a whole life of work experience,arising at 5 a.m.to go lift truckloads of merchandise,then arranging it all to whoevers standards it meets.
And,I do have some people I really like and can rely on for laughs and support.Laughing at work is one of the best stress relievers ever.
I actually had a job long ago doing meals on wheels for people in the area.I could not wait to get to it everyday for a long time due to the laughing and incredible people I met there.They are all still friends that I still see.A great experience!
But the thing I love the most is my home,what a lovely little place with woods across the street and very country like setting in town.I grew up out in the country about 10 miles from here And have lived in town for 30 yrs and not liking it much.So this is just amazing to us.
But it would never have happened without the incredible generosity of my wonderful sister and brother-in-law.Its very hard to describe the love we all have for each other,but it grows constantly and they have produced the family I always wanted.
I wont go in to my family history now,but it was very ugly and its important to remember that,as Maya Angelou says: 'Words are "things"".The words that were said and often shouted in my home as a teen were so negative and I will spend the rest of my life trying not to behave in a way I was "taught" to react.Remember,another Maya,"At our best we are all teachers".The words that come out of our mouths are teaching,either good or bad.I try to remember this always and I fail a lot.But I continue everyday to try to renew and confirm that I believe love is everything and if I am able to love without condition I am at the best place I can be.
I have been struggling a lot with staying in a grateful state.This is my first full day off in ten so perhaps Im burned out.(sore too but thats daily).
My life at work is confusing and difficult,too many bosses and wasted time on doing what one says and then turning around and doing it differently because the other one says something opposite.
So glad to finally have bennies but the toll it takes on my meager paycheck is major so I will continue looking for better work.Anyone out there open their paycheck and get sad?Sometimes I even get tears brimming.
BUT,remembering what I have instead of dont have helps a lot.
My wife has been awesome to me,understanding how frustrating it is for a 53 yr old man with talents and a whole life of work experience,arising at 5 a.m.to go lift truckloads of merchandise,then arranging it all to whoevers standards it meets.
And,I do have some people I really like and can rely on for laughs and support.Laughing at work is one of the best stress relievers ever.
I actually had a job long ago doing meals on wheels for people in the area.I could not wait to get to it everyday for a long time due to the laughing and incredible people I met there.They are all still friends that I still see.A great experience!
But the thing I love the most is my home,what a lovely little place with woods across the street and very country like setting in town.I grew up out in the country about 10 miles from here And have lived in town for 30 yrs and not liking it much.So this is just amazing to us.
But it would never have happened without the incredible generosity of my wonderful sister and brother-in-law.Its very hard to describe the love we all have for each other,but it grows constantly and they have produced the family I always wanted.
I wont go in to my family history now,but it was very ugly and its important to remember that,as Maya Angelou says: 'Words are "things"".The words that were said and often shouted in my home as a teen were so negative and I will spend the rest of my life trying not to behave in a way I was "taught" to react.Remember,another Maya,"At our best we are all teachers".The words that come out of our mouths are teaching,either good or bad.I try to remember this always and I fail a lot.But I continue everyday to try to renew and confirm that I believe love is everything and if I am able to love without condition I am at the best place I can be.
Monday, April 15, 2013
Ahard day today,most of the time work is easy to get through but today was rough.Mostly due to feeling sorry for myself and and not staying focused on the good that has come my way.
There are times when it seems I cant get past feeling used up.
And to be honest ,it isnt always easy to accept that some people are doing so well and my wife and I struggle to pay "everything!!"
Yup,some days I do want to scream"Its not fair!"
But if I think it through I know how lucky I actually am and the feelings pass on.
I have had sooo many blessings in my life,which Ive talked about before.
I guess what bugs me is people not realizing how lucky they are when they have a life that they can pay all their bills and more,go on vacations,have a cushion etc.The town I live in is well to do and its hard for me to see any gratefulness in them.
I know this is a risky subject.....class wars and the like,so I wont continue,the discussion never ends.
I am still writing from the library.Hoping for a fix on my home computer soon,some matters take precidence over others,in the world of poor and content.
There are times when it seems I cant get past feeling used up.
And to be honest ,it isnt always easy to accept that some people are doing so well and my wife and I struggle to pay "everything!!"
Yup,some days I do want to scream"Its not fair!"
But if I think it through I know how lucky I actually am and the feelings pass on.
I have had sooo many blessings in my life,which Ive talked about before.
I guess what bugs me is people not realizing how lucky they are when they have a life that they can pay all their bills and more,go on vacations,have a cushion etc.The town I live in is well to do and its hard for me to see any gratefulness in them.
I know this is a risky subject.....class wars and the like,so I wont continue,the discussion never ends.
I am still writing from the library.Hoping for a fix on my home computer soon,some matters take precidence over others,in the world of poor and content.
Monday, April 1, 2013
I have been lost since my computer has gone down.No money to fix and so miss my blog I just started.
The good news today is after almost 5 years of money and employment troubles I have been taken on full time w/added bennies.
The gratitude and relief I feel is not explainable.
For all of you struggling......keep going,work when you can,no matter what the money or job.
My troubles are far from over but Im creeping back and some of the grunt work I was doing was the hardest of my life(and Ive done some grunt work in my time)
This job is very physical but not near as exhausting as unloading trucks.
I worry some as I get older of getting work related injuries,so its better in so many ways.
I will be here at the library till the computer is fixed......so that wont be real often.
In the mean time poor and contenters,practice gratitude and be still,take your journey dont fight it.
The good news today is after almost 5 years of money and employment troubles I have been taken on full time w/added bennies.
The gratitude and relief I feel is not explainable.
For all of you struggling......keep going,work when you can,no matter what the money or job.
My troubles are far from over but Im creeping back and some of the grunt work I was doing was the hardest of my life(and Ive done some grunt work in my time)
This job is very physical but not near as exhausting as unloading trucks.
I worry some as I get older of getting work related injuries,so its better in so many ways.
I will be here at the library till the computer is fixed......so that wont be real often.
In the mean time poor and contenters,practice gratitude and be still,take your journey dont fight it.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Today I am going to spend some time talking about my two nieces.They are both my sisters daughters and they have brought so much to our world since they arrived.I am missing Jessies play(shes 13) and Sydneys
birthday she is now 11!I had to work and missed it all.I really dont like when my real life is intruded on by
my work life,who does.....but its more than that ......it so out of balance and robs you of some really special times.
Sydney.......she is tiny,she is happy,she is beautiful,she is musical ,mostly she is compassionate and kind.
A trait both girls have.
Syddy is very much like me in the way she looks at things,often my sister has said,"shes just like you!)Which
makes me feel so full!
I have had lots and lots of laughs and silly times w/Syd.And watched endless episodes of scooby doo.Last summer we played operation and she laughed at me constantly for messing up.She also made up her own rules.Not suprising as she is a take charge person.Should I have let her do it?Absolutely!The ride is always a fun one when spending the day with Syd.......I love you sweet girl.
Jessie........she is stunning,she is funny,she is interested and most of all her care for others feelings is more than remarkable at 13.
Jess is very much like my sister in certain ways,which is great because my sister has been a constant love spot on my heart her whole life......and now Jess!
I got to go to her bat mitzvah in october,the whole thing was beautiful and Jess was so spot on.I hope she knows that I havent been that dressed up in literally years!So much fun and love!
I got to go out to dinner with her one night when I had come to watch them in Chicago.Syd was at a sleep over.Before we went out I said ;"should I pull my hair back before we go out?"(i have looong hair)She looked at me blankly.And I repeated myself and she said in a why is this an issue voice;"Im proud of you!)
Acceptance......what we all want and need to practice and here is a 10 at the time girl and it just came out so easily.It touched me in a very deep way and I cant tell you how much I love you dear Jess.
Poor?not by a long stretch .....look at just two off the people that make me rich of soul and love.And there are so many others.This is the contentment I speak of, look at what you have first,gratitude can always at least put some balance on your feelings.
birthday she is now 11!I had to work and missed it all.I really dont like when my real life is intruded on by
my work life,who does.....but its more than that ......it so out of balance and robs you of some really special times.
Sydney.......she is tiny,she is happy,she is beautiful,she is musical ,mostly she is compassionate and kind.
A trait both girls have.
Syddy is very much like me in the way she looks at things,often my sister has said,"shes just like you!)Which
makes me feel so full!
I have had lots and lots of laughs and silly times w/Syd.And watched endless episodes of scooby doo.Last summer we played operation and she laughed at me constantly for messing up.She also made up her own rules.Not suprising as she is a take charge person.Should I have let her do it?Absolutely!The ride is always a fun one when spending the day with Syd.......I love you sweet girl.
Jessie........she is stunning,she is funny,she is interested and most of all her care for others feelings is more than remarkable at 13.
Jess is very much like my sister in certain ways,which is great because my sister has been a constant love spot on my heart her whole life......and now Jess!
I got to go to her bat mitzvah in october,the whole thing was beautiful and Jess was so spot on.I hope she knows that I havent been that dressed up in literally years!So much fun and love!
I got to go out to dinner with her one night when I had come to watch them in Chicago.Syd was at a sleep over.Before we went out I said ;"should I pull my hair back before we go out?"(i have looong hair)She looked at me blankly.And I repeated myself and she said in a why is this an issue voice;"Im proud of you!)
Acceptance......what we all want and need to practice and here is a 10 at the time girl and it just came out so easily.It touched me in a very deep way and I cant tell you how much I love you dear Jess.
Poor?not by a long stretch .....look at just two off the people that make me rich of soul and love.And there are so many others.This is the contentment I speak of, look at what you have first,gratitude can always at least put some balance on your feelings.
Friday, March 1, 2013
Just home from work and a stop at Walmart.People have lots of opinions about shopping there,but I simply go there because of the cheapest ingredients for cooking I can find.And being in my low income bracket it helps dramatically.
I always tell young people to learn how to cook.
My wife and I had tons of fun having dinner parties in our 20s.And knowing a few things about cooking really helped.
At the time I was singing and playing piano for a living.I had the time of my life and regret none of it.Follow dreams people,dont sit thinking you cant do something.I played for ten years without the benefit of any other
income.Truly lived a performers life.
Then having no job experience what so ever,I went in to the food prep biz for real.
My grandma had a farm and had to feed the workers who came to harvest.She had a regular stove and a woodburning one for baking.
Needless to say Iearned tremendous amounts about cooking from her.
I started out as an aide at a senior center that prepared site lunches as well as homebound meals(meals on wheels).
Within a year I was cooking and preping for 800 meals a day.I had 3 others working with me that became life long freinds.I have not had a job before or since that I actually couldnt wait to get to as we laughed a lot and all the time.One can go slightly nuts pounding and flattening 400 chicken breasts for cordon bleu..
One of the best times of my life(I did not appreciate the music years till later,I was much to serious about it)
We went through a bunch together and still laugh our asses off when we get together......its been 20 yrs since I started there.
Im a person who actually doesnt mind getting older,so much calmer and learning what to care about and what not to.And Im absolutely still smitten by my wife Wendi.We celebrate 30 years this summer,only 8 of them legal.Yes folks we lived in sin for 23 years before we got married.
Sharing your life with the right person is something I never expected.My examples of marriage growing up were not something I wished to emulate.Im sorry it didnt work out for my folks,the saddest part was it took 26 years for them to divorce.I could see it was over at 10 yrs old.I was 22 when they split.
At any rate,its time for me to get some dinner on now,here is the Poor and Content budget recipe of the day. 2 boxes of Zatarans spanish rice on sale 2.00
1 large can of all white chicken 1.98
2 cans of diced tomatoes 68 cents each
Diced onion and greenpepper (already had)
Prepare your rice,mix all the rest together ,put in a covered baking dish and bake at 350 till hot.
The last few minutes throw some kind of cheese on top and bake w/out lid till melted.)
total cost 5.34 and serves at least four.
Im using a box rice in place of my usual brown rice because it was on sale.But you can make this and spice it yourself or if your frightened about spices use a packet of taco or any mexican seasoning.Add a bag of frozen green beans and you have a full meal.Usually a bag of them is a buck!
Peace to all of you poor and content folks and even more to all of you who are still struggling w/lifes suprises.
I always tell young people to learn how to cook.
My wife and I had tons of fun having dinner parties in our 20s.And knowing a few things about cooking really helped.
At the time I was singing and playing piano for a living.I had the time of my life and regret none of it.Follow dreams people,dont sit thinking you cant do something.I played for ten years without the benefit of any other
income.Truly lived a performers life.
Then having no job experience what so ever,I went in to the food prep biz for real.
My grandma had a farm and had to feed the workers who came to harvest.She had a regular stove and a woodburning one for baking.
Needless to say Iearned tremendous amounts about cooking from her.
I started out as an aide at a senior center that prepared site lunches as well as homebound meals(meals on wheels).
Within a year I was cooking and preping for 800 meals a day.I had 3 others working with me that became life long freinds.I have not had a job before or since that I actually couldnt wait to get to as we laughed a lot and all the time.One can go slightly nuts pounding and flattening 400 chicken breasts for cordon bleu..
One of the best times of my life(I did not appreciate the music years till later,I was much to serious about it)
We went through a bunch together and still laugh our asses off when we get together......its been 20 yrs since I started there.
Im a person who actually doesnt mind getting older,so much calmer and learning what to care about and what not to.And Im absolutely still smitten by my wife Wendi.We celebrate 30 years this summer,only 8 of them legal.Yes folks we lived in sin for 23 years before we got married.
Sharing your life with the right person is something I never expected.My examples of marriage growing up were not something I wished to emulate.Im sorry it didnt work out for my folks,the saddest part was it took 26 years for them to divorce.I could see it was over at 10 yrs old.I was 22 when they split.
At any rate,its time for me to get some dinner on now,here is the Poor and Content budget recipe of the day. 2 boxes of Zatarans spanish rice on sale 2.00
1 large can of all white chicken 1.98
2 cans of diced tomatoes 68 cents each
Diced onion and greenpepper (already had)
Prepare your rice,mix all the rest together ,put in a covered baking dish and bake at 350 till hot.
The last few minutes throw some kind of cheese on top and bake w/out lid till melted.)
total cost 5.34 and serves at least four.
Im using a box rice in place of my usual brown rice because it was on sale.But you can make this and spice it yourself or if your frightened about spices use a packet of taco or any mexican seasoning.Add a bag of frozen green beans and you have a full meal.Usually a bag of them is a buck!
Peace to all of you poor and content folks and even more to all of you who are still struggling w/lifes suprises.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Perhaps some of you may be working a job that you feel does not measure up to all the talents you were able to use at your "good job"and are feeling thrown away.
I felt this at first after I lost mine,after all I was 48 at the time and things were good for me.There was a degree of stress I didnt care for but all jobs have this at times.
What I found interesting was how much satisfaction I could feel by just doing a good days work and leaving it there,and not worry about hassles.
The new job has added obligations but nothing I shouldnt be able to handle.And of course I have had some bad jobs in my life and feel I have seen it all at 52.
What Im talking about here is stepping outside of yourself and watching how your whole day can change by commiting everyday, to aproach your day in a state of grace and trying to bring good energy.
No it is not easy, it takes actual practice but in the end it actually works.
I mess up all the time but my intentions are always to be of service and open hearted to others
Try to begin..........you will notice change
I felt this at first after I lost mine,after all I was 48 at the time and things were good for me.There was a degree of stress I didnt care for but all jobs have this at times.
What I found interesting was how much satisfaction I could feel by just doing a good days work and leaving it there,and not worry about hassles.
The new job has added obligations but nothing I shouldnt be able to handle.And of course I have had some bad jobs in my life and feel I have seen it all at 52.
What Im talking about here is stepping outside of yourself and watching how your whole day can change by commiting everyday, to aproach your day in a state of grace and trying to bring good energy.
No it is not easy, it takes actual practice but in the end it actually works.
I mess up all the time but my intentions are always to be of service and open hearted to others
Try to begin..........you will notice change
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Here is a perfect example of what us poor folk struggle with all the time......cars!
After I finished the first blog I took off for the store in our 1995 very loud ford taurus.As I was returning I hit a bump causing the car to become louder and the steering went so I had to pull w/all my weight to turn the car.
Now in the past I would have gone completely nuts over something I cant do anything about,but as I have been putting gratitude first and waiting a second before I react,I was able to say right away that at least I got home ,didnt get hurt,and we have another car we can share till times are better.
Our other car is a 1997 sebring convertable that my wifes mother had for years before us,but it is a great car and its fun to zip around in.We will pray it stays okay,and are lucky to have "car guys" in the family that can fix small things for less money.
Nope ......its not gonna ruin my day.
After I finished the first blog I took off for the store in our 1995 very loud ford taurus.As I was returning I hit a bump causing the car to become louder and the steering went so I had to pull w/all my weight to turn the car.
Now in the past I would have gone completely nuts over something I cant do anything about,but as I have been putting gratitude first and waiting a second before I react,I was able to say right away that at least I got home ,didnt get hurt,and we have another car we can share till times are better.
Our other car is a 1997 sebring convertable that my wifes mother had for years before us,but it is a great car and its fun to zip around in.We will pray it stays okay,and are lucky to have "car guys" in the family that can fix small things for less money.
Nope ......its not gonna ruin my day.
Welcome to my blog.
Today is my first post and it wont be too long.
I am one of millions who lost jobs in 2008 and have taken the journey of losing a lot and trying to stay afloat.
My intention of Poor and Content is for to be a place for gratefulness and living as fully as possible without
lots of money.
I had a good job and bennies at a long term care facility as a supervisor and culture change associate,
We were working hard to make our building a place of love and happiness as opposed to the loneliness
helplessness and boredom you find in so many places.
It all ended suddenly after I was told they couldnt live w/out me two months before.I must say my severance
was a good one but of course could never compensate for what my wife and I didnt see coming.
I was out of work for 3 years and now work in a shoe stockroom making the money of a high school job.
I just got this job after a year and a half of working extremely hard on the dock and making even less money.
The gratefulness I feel for this is so hard to describe.My wife and I have never been rich but we have been
much better off than this.Having benefits is a dream come true after so long w/out.
The biggest thrill of our lives came 2 years ago when my sister and brother-in-law bought us a three bedroom house and we are paying them a small mortgage.Life saving and changing.We were living in a rented dump of a house and paying way to much.
I realize that everyone has a different story of survival out here and also realize that people have way worse stories.
Poor and Content will hopefully be a place for understanding and sharing and actually not just about the financial.
We can become better people by just living fully no matter what our station is in life.Success has many definitions.Being content is one,and thats what I am today.
By the way, the pic is of me opening my front door was taken moments after I signed the papers.A silly
picture,but accurate as to what I was feeling inside.
Today is my first post and it wont be too long.
I am one of millions who lost jobs in 2008 and have taken the journey of losing a lot and trying to stay afloat.
My intention of Poor and Content is for to be a place for gratefulness and living as fully as possible without
lots of money.
I had a good job and bennies at a long term care facility as a supervisor and culture change associate,
We were working hard to make our building a place of love and happiness as opposed to the loneliness
helplessness and boredom you find in so many places.
It all ended suddenly after I was told they couldnt live w/out me two months before.I must say my severance
was a good one but of course could never compensate for what my wife and I didnt see coming.
I was out of work for 3 years and now work in a shoe stockroom making the money of a high school job.
I just got this job after a year and a half of working extremely hard on the dock and making even less money.
The gratefulness I feel for this is so hard to describe.My wife and I have never been rich but we have been
much better off than this.Having benefits is a dream come true after so long w/out.
The biggest thrill of our lives came 2 years ago when my sister and brother-in-law bought us a three bedroom house and we are paying them a small mortgage.Life saving and changing.We were living in a rented dump of a house and paying way to much.
I realize that everyone has a different story of survival out here and also realize that people have way worse stories.
Poor and Content will hopefully be a place for understanding and sharing and actually not just about the financial.
We can become better people by just living fully no matter what our station is in life.Success has many definitions.Being content is one,and thats what I am today.
By the way, the pic is of me opening my front door was taken moments after I signed the papers.A silly
picture,but accurate as to what I was feeling inside.
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